it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
