around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
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