:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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