it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
