woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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