I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I'm going to jail i love you
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Randomize