i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
