You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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