i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
His nipple licking is glorious
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