I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
