I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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