Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize