listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
