let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize
