2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I will be naked everywhere
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
