R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
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