Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
