I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Randomize
