He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
