I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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