so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
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