and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Found the puke drawer
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
