is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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