her vagine was all disorganized.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize