Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
