My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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