At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Randomize
