Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
