I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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