All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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