using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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