go do what you do best...puke behind churches
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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