He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
