I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
