Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
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