I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
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