i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
