Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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