is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
