You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
