i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
