Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Randomize
