"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
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