It's like a parade of train wrecks.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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