We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Randomize