i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
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