I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
