Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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