watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Randomize
