whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
